People. Apparently God's best creation. Also His most frustrating one! God cares about people. He cares about them when we can't. Sometimes that is the only reason we can care about people is because He does. The caring doesn't make it easy to get close, to push past barriers, to open ourselves up; that is our own choice, but God does the caring.
About a month ago now, God did something that was new to me. He often brings new people into my life, but never before has He told me to hold onto someone, not to let go, that He had brought them into my life and me into their life for a reason, to care for them NO MATTER WHAT. I knew straight away that it wasn't going to be easy. I love this person wholeheartedly, but already in this short period there have been some ups and downs, a real rollercoaster and that's not going to stop. However some of the lessons I have learnt through their life and in walking life with them - a tenacity for God, what it is to hunger for Him, what real joy is and how it can only come from God. That He is our only hope and strength, to really think for myself, to consider others more, to consider other viewpoints, to truly understand the need for God in each of our lives in a way more real than ever before, and that's only part of it.
People have their limits. I'd never come across someone's before. I hadn't before felt the need to try to understand someone at that level. Another new experience. It was harder than I expected. Confusion in not understanding, a struggle with wanting to understand, respecting boundaries, hope that ground can be recovered - that I've not gone too far, regret for pain caused, asking for forgiveness.
It also brought up the question about what my limits are and where they are to be found. In this last month they have been pushed as much as they have up to this point and when approached in a caring matter by someone whom I trust, it appears those gates are flimsy indeed. I am yet to discover whether that is bad or good. It is slightly daunting to have seen another's barriers and to realise what has caused them to be so. Dare I wonder what God has in store for me in the future? James 1:2-4 "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." Does the lack of real trials in my life mean I am immature and incomplete, and/or is it an indicator that those trials are yet to come?
It is a joy, a struggle, a privilege and a journey, a journey that God has made clear is not to end. God doesn't give up on people, therefore I won't give up on you either, as long as He gives me the strength and love to continue.
Psalm 139
1 O LORD, you have searched me
and you know me.
and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
you are familiar with all my ways.
4 Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O LORD.
you know it completely, O LORD.
5 You hem me in—behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.
you have laid your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.
too lofty for me to attain.
7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.
your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,"
and the light become night around me,"
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.
13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.
you knit me together in my mother's womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
16 your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!
How vast is the sum of them!
18 Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand.
When I awake,
I am still with you.
they would outnumber the grains of sand.
When I awake,
I am still with you.
19 If only you would slay the wicked, O God!
Away from me, you bloodthirsty men!
Away from me, you bloodthirsty men!
20 They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.
your adversaries misuse your name.
21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD,
and abhor those who rise up against you?
and abhor those who rise up against you?
22 I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.
I count them my enemies.
23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.
and lead me in the way everlasting.
Hi Danielle,
ReplyDeleteIt is often only through God's love that we can love the unlovely. :)
God enables us to see people the way that He does, and how wonderful that is.
Have a wonderful weekend,
Blessings,
Jillian ♥
People are frustrating ~ but by this shall all men know that we are His disciples, by the love that we have one for another. Sometimes it is our brothers & sisters in Christ who are hardest to love. Give me a good pagan any day! ☺ Ganeida.
ReplyDeleteSorry love; am signed into someone else's account.
No, no, it's not the unlovely. This new friend is fantastic and God uses them in so many ways in my life and others, it's me not being perceptive enough and pushing too far. Through God's grace and theirs I ask for forgiveness and hope all is not lost there.
ReplyDelete